I do realize that arguments are normal within families, but I'm VERY sure that this will end the way I think it will. How can I cope? What processes will I have to go through? Can I start living on my own to get away? Impractical I know, but now it's a dream.How do I cope with a future divorce????
A divorce is a long ways off first comes the separation and not all couples who separate go through with a divorce. Some times all they really needed was to be apart for awhile. When your with someone for so long you don't realize what you have until you lose it. I'm speaking from experience my husband left me and my son who was 15 at the time. He moved out and into his own apartment for 2 1/2 years but within that time we started dating he slept over and i over his place. What I'm saying is we become strangers and two different people as the years passed. By going out we started talking and having fun with each other like it use to be in the beginning. Don't give up on your parents just yet.How do I cope with a future divorce????
think of today as a present and live what u got right now, dont worry about whats in few months or whats in few years. I would suggest you to focus on urself, u're gonna be adult and independent soon and u would wanna travel the world or do what u like, u would not need to be around ur mommy %26amp; daddy anymore, its their decision if they want to bicker or argue or get separated, but knowing this, they will always be ur mom %26amp; dad and will always be around. Maybe it will make them a better life and happier or they will bicker for the rest of their live together until they're really old, trust me, ive seen it.
Just go with the flow, Do what you can to get them to get along, Dont take sides, Once your 18 you can live on your own, Maybe that will take some of the stress away from them? It much easier to cope with when your older verses being a young child to go thru it.. Im sorry to hear about what your going thru!
The best thing to do is to sit them down and tell them how you feel. Be honest. Let them know that the fighting is starting to bother you and ask them to either get help, or keep it down. This my be the kick in the butt that they need to get back on track. It helped with my parents. They had been married 17 years when this started, they have been married now 25.
I am a mother of two, an 8 yr old girl and 5 yr old boy. I will be divorced this week. Officially. It is the hardest thing a parent goes through. I stayed for years, when I shoudl have left. I stayed thinking it was best for my children. The truth is, a mom and dad love you no matter if they are together or not. And sometimes, when there is arguing and emotional battles, that gets in the way and causes ';static'; so we as parents can't concentrate on our children.
You have to know love, this is not your doing. It completely effects you, but you had no part in what went wrong. Do not blame yourself, it is not your fault.
You have to take it a day at a time. And if you feel it is too much to bear sometimes, you need to find someone to talk to. To ';Vent';
I do not suggest leaving home, unless there is abuse to you. Your parents love you i'm sure.
You will go through anger, resentment, you will feel like you have no control over your life. You will be sad, feel torn, like maybe you should choose a side?
My 5 yr old doesn't really understand what is going on. My 8 yr old does. and when something bothers her, we sit and talk it through, even if she is mad at me for decisions I am making for us, I tell her it is ok. She has a right to be upset. Open communication is what is pulling my children and I through this.
I tell my daughter she doesn't have to choose me or dad. We are both her parents and love her. She is 50% him and 50%me. I never have spoken badly about the dad, even when I wanted.
I am so sorry you have to go through this. It is one of the hardest things ever. You have the option to let this break you..... or to make you stronger as a person.
Well think of it this way, would you prefer your parents to stay together and be unhappy and fighting all the time or would you rather see them apart but happy and not fighting... I think i'd rather see them separated, my parents fought throughout my whole childhood, and it really messed me up, now for no reasons i start fights with my husband and then i realize why did i have to make a fight out of that, when i could've just talked it out and it would've gotten fixed immediately..... You can move out when you're 18.. but make sure it's soo you can get into a dorm and go to college because yrs later you'll regret not going to college.
I realy am sorry to hear that you are going through this. I am going through a divorce myself , the process started a few months ago. I know its realy hard on my kids. But we try to talk alot. The way I look at it is that they will always have their father and they will always have their mother too, but just not together. They don't have to witness the intimidation or arguements any more. They don't have to wounder any more, they don't have to see their mother all the time any more, they also don't have to witness their father putting their mother down constently, and don't have to have a father in their life constantly that is making all the wrong decisions. They do not have to be a witness to all of that all the time. This way there will be pain for sometime from the seperation but also some peace from not having all of this in their every day lifes. I wish things could have been different in our life or yours, but unfourtunely people do things without realizing how much they are hurting the ones that love them the most. Wish you luck you will be in my prayers. And if you can pray for your parents also.
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