How do you cope?

How do you cope with a seperation or divorce?





I feel lost. I can't stop thinking ';What am I going to do now?';





Please don't tell me to get involved in activties. I don't have the money and I live in a small town that doesn't have those things. And I've drifted quite far away from my friends :(How do you cope?
Well, it is true that this is a devastating time. I know....I am THERE. The thing you have to do is acknowledge the loss. You might struggle to both believe and disbelieve that this could happen to you. It happened. It is rel. Recognize that a loss has taken place. You may wonder if you are strong enough to bear such a loss. You ARE strong enough. You are alive. You will survive.


At this point (when the loss is so new) you have to know there is nothing to be done. Only accept it.....and hurt. To get to healing, you have to go through it. A book I read that helped me ALOT was


How to Survive The Loss of a Love. By Bloomfield and Colgrove. I think I got it from Amazon.com. It takes you from the beginning of the loss to when you are healing. It is not a long book, just little phrases that are very real and helpful and true.


You will survive even though it doesn't seem like it now.How do you cope?
This is normal. You are going through separation anxiety. Try making a list of the things you want to experience now that you are single. Then go experience them. Some activities do not cost much. There are a number of support groups you can join on line. Since you posted this here I am assuming you have access to a PC. Join a number of groups Online and pass the time while you go through your separation anxiety.





Go see family and by all means, reconnect with your friends or make new ones.





Take the time you need to mourn the loss of your relationship. So cry and raise hell within your home..get it out. Then seek friendship and support groups. Get some hobbies like going to a coffeehouse that has wifi and surf the net, drink coffee and socialize. Go bicycling, take a walk.





Babysit, do odd jobs to bring in extra cash as well as allow you to socialize with others.





Self reflect on what is important to you now and make that list of what you want to experience in your single life.
I cope by choosing too. Life is what it is and u have to deal w/ what u got. If u dwell on all the what if's then u miss out on what could be (smart man told me that). Ur marriage is over but not ur life. Now u have the chance to live it anyway u want!! What ur gonna do now is show that man he did not take the best of u, that u will be better off w/ out him... then u prove it!
My wife and I separated for a little while a couple years ago, and during that separation what helped me was having friends %26amp; family near by who were very supportive and also helped me to not think about it so much.
you have to make your own life are d i v o r c e ,,,, maybe moved to a big place , make new friends , get a job , you have to kept active,
Start making plans to rebuild your life. Put your energy into it and make it happen.
If we can't tell you to keep your self busy, then what do you want to hear.....Work....be strong and pick up the broken pieces...The sun shines after the rain
Do you have kids?