Im NOT happy anymore!?

im so unhappy in my current situation..im not going to get into all the details, but I have tried to get my husband to understand how I feel. i don't think he does..and Im contemplating divorce, I Love my husband very much but im so unhappy, we have four children together, he is a great father but horrible husband...I don't know if being unhappy comes from him, but he is not making things easier on me...in order for me to be happy I know what I have to do, But i will be making everyone around me unhappy...so I can make things better for myself, BUT in the presses I will devastate the children with a divorce...what can I do..do children cope with divorce??





I should add...my husband has never hit me or cheated on me..he is just very snotty, cocky, thinks he is better then EVERYONE, and a little obsessive, he also has NO sense of humorIm NOT happy anymore!?
Well, you certainly need help. But before you decide too quickly about divorce- nothing in the wedding vows I have ever heard said '; I promise to make you happy';.





NOW stay with me! You do have my sympathy and support as he clearly has dropped the ball! His promise to love and cherish you is far from his mind.





I think you can deal with him as it sounds from your admission that he is faithful, a good dad, hard worker, and generally is a good guy.





Get good advise ';outside'; this forum such as your faith/spiritual leader, counselor, doctor, parents, good friends that have a successful marriages ( it won't help to talk to failures especially if they hate their ex.). That ';misery loves company'; is a bad idea if you want to save or improve your marriage





Lastly do not forget what brought the two of you together and use that.


He may be open to some alone time so these things can be worked out. Trust what worked when things were good.





You need to love him more even when you don't.


He needs a wake up call.


Good luck!Im NOT happy anymore!?
It is more devastating to your children seeing you unhappy, and yes, they do cope with divorce as other millions of kids around the world. Its always hard and painful, true, but its also true that the real happiness you can give your child is being a good parent, love them, give them your time, teach them good examples. That is what is going to mold their lives, that is why you had them, not to disappoint them by making them believe mom and dad are happy when they really are not. This will only teach them to live a life of lies.





Their happiness begins with yours.
Stay and be happy without depending on him for it first.


If you still want to divorce when that happens, then divorce.





Nothing here is a deal-breaker.





';I'm not happy'; generally means something is wrong with you.


Make absolutely certain you cannot be happy with your current husband.





You next husband isn't going to be ';perfect'; (and frankly neither are you.)





Courage to change the things you can, Wisdom to accept the things you can't.





It's not like your husband /suddenly/ became narcissistic.


I believe if you reflect on it, the same underlying traits are responsible for the things that drew you to him.
I think sometimes you have to look at the situation from all points of views, for instance your kids might be suffering more if you stay with your husband. You mentioned you make everyone around you unhappy, maybe if you seperate you can find yourself again, I think often woman loose theirselves to the marriage and forget the things that really make you smile... Find what makes you happy and your kids will see that and be happy too.
I would sit down with the children and talk to him about most children understand but depending with the age most older kids over 13 will understand but under that they probably be sad and cant understand. Sit down with your husband and just tell him your unhappy and what you want to do and just tell him straight up what you want to do,dot beat around the bush about it.
tell him his personality sucks and what the hell is wrong. he needs to see counseling - but this will catch him completely off guard so prepare for the worst. If the worst occurs, that should reinforce your point. If not, then maybe he's not too far gone to save. Start with counseling and work your way up from there - too many other lives at stake.
you did not say anything bad about him and you are thinking of divorcing him? whats wrong with you?


please read what you wrote again without emotions few times you may get it. start with a vacation from yourself.
So he was like this before you married and still married him? Or he has changed since? Tell him you want the man you married or leave now and make this easier on the rest of the family.
If he has so many faults, why did you marry him in the first place?





Answer that to yourself %26amp; maybe your situation will change.
Join the g*****n club.