What's the best way to help grandson cope with parents' divorce?

My grandson is in grade school and having a hard time dealing with his parents getting divorced. Both parents are good to him but they are very involved with their new social lives as single people. He is too young to have any control over his life and I can see how the anxiety and worry affects him..... bed-wetting, chewing fingernails, scared of the dark, easily angered, etc.





I know his parents won't want to talk about this with me. I don't want to make them mad as that would just make things worse for my grandson. How can a grandparent help? Should he talk with a counselor? Any suggestions appreciated.What's the best way to help grandson cope with parents' divorce?
Two things come to mind. First assure them that this is in no way the child's fault. Second is to continually reassure this child that they are loved even tho this terrible thing is unfolding in their life. Very sad thing the effect on children. Condolences and warmest wishes.What's the best way to help grandson cope with parents' divorce?
just be supportive and dont take sides. Divorce is hard on children. We took my grandchildren who were preschool age to a counselor who specializes in this area. The oldest one ended up going for several visits. It was very helpful and reassured them that they were safe and not the cause of the problems and gave them good ways to cope and express their feelings and fears.
Yup! a.)It is not his fault. b.)He can work it out. c.)God made him strong. d.)He still has parents, just not at the same place. e.)No matter what, parents and GRANDparents love him. And act like you trust him to learn to live with the situation. It is not necessary for him to understand the 'why' of the divorce (tricky explaining the craziness.) For yourself: remember that kids are stronger and more flexible than most adults give them credit. Love him to death, and keep it up!
Some good answers here...not knowing all the details, the only one thing I will say and caution you on is the counseling. THAT decision and move can be made ONLY by the parents UNLESS you are the custodial guardian.





In the meantime just make you and your home a source of love, fun and support for him. There is no need to bring up the subject actually...when and if the child feels 'safe' he/she will begin talking.
yes he needs counseling or it will find other ways to come out..you may go see the school councilor the parents are in denial but he is having problems go over their heads..and good luck
Give him all the love that you can and be available whenever he wants to talk. Before going to a counselor find out if it's a problem that you can solve within the family. A counselor may make him scared and more distant.
I have my grandson involved with the Cub Scouts. It is really a wholesome fun him to do and meet friends.
Let your grandson know you love him to bits,


and will always be there for him.
MizD, You are so right...


Ignoring the problem is the worst thing a parent can do ...just be supportive for your grandchild. and let him know you are a Constant, a given, a Rock he can lean on...Let him know you LOVE Both His Mom and dad and he is free to speak in front of you about his mom, I know you have expressed this issue before. He is Part of Her , and this is confusing for him, as his Dad is in conflict with her, he feels rejected too. Let you Grand son know he can always be Safe with You... Tell Him this with Words, No matter how hard. It comes easiest in the Car when riding , side by side, as we do not have to ';really'; Admit...We are communicating, but we are! My Husband is from a Divorced family and still has pain from the split.
The poor dear. Not only is he suffering but he is doing it alone. At this age , children feel responsible for the trouble. Although he/she idefinitelyly not. As a Grandmom, do you have alone time with him? Is it possible or is the distance to great? It is obvious from his behavior, he is suffering. This angel needs counseling., Pronto! Only with someone who specializes with kids. They need a differenapproachch than an adult therapist would give. If talking is truly impossible with the parents, how about someone at school (if he is old enough to go) even a daycare worker. This child has no one right now and on top of it, he feels this is his fault. Make the school promise (in writing) not to reveal your conversation. Then they will be liable. Can you pick him up from school and go visit a ';friend';? (A doctor)
Just let him know that although his parents can no longer live with one another that they both still love him. Divorce is so hard for children to understand. They have no idea how hard marriage can be. They always think that the divorce is their fault. Just reassure him that none of it is his fault. You don't say how old he is but the younger the better. When they are young they get over things faster. Just give him plenty of love and be there to listen to what he says. They tell you a lot without even knowing it.
This is a tough one.


You don't say how close you are to him geographically, so I'm going to assume you're close.


It might be a good time to have him over more.


I think I'd say something like this to him.


';I sure am upset about your mom and dad's break up. You know, sometimes I can't sleep because of it.';


That will give him an opportunity to say something about his feelings back to you.


One more thing; say something like this. ';You know, with all this turmoil going on in our family, I'm sure glad you and I have each other';.


This is a rough road. Just make sure he knows you're there, and that's not going to change.





Edit; One more thing.....for some reason, kids think it's their fault that mom and dad are breaking up. That would be the first thing I'd address. You really have to talk about that.