i am so sorry, i lost twin boys they were still born, i feel your pain. BUT honey this pain will pass, it just takes time. as far as your husband is it the marriage or the passing of the child he is really dealing with. he may be using the passing as an excuse to get out, and the marriage was going bad way before. so anyway if you know its the marriage and there is no going back. i would say do the best you can to move on. you are dealing now with 2 losses and that will be hard. seek out help from family and friends. maybe a therapist. try to stay busy. keep in mind that you are going through 2 losses and dealing with the grieving process will be hard and take time, but allow yourself to feel the pain. do not do anything harmful of course, but allow yourself to grieve, cry, laugh, run, scream what ever it takes to get through the day. and as each day passes you will slowly feel better. journaling is good too. i am sorry again and i wish you well. How to heal after the break up of my marriage?
I'm sorry for your loss. Your son is in peace in his arms. I'm sorry that your marriage is rocky too but I would like to suggest you to seek medical advice and some anti depressant.. you were pregnant and then you also lost your baby your hormones your loss everything is taking a toll on u n your marriage. This is the time for u and your husband to be together since he has lost his baby too. I'm sorry I don't mean to lecture you but if this is the only reason and otherwise if your husband is a good husband try n repair your mrg if u like if u want. I had a miscarriage too and went thru same thing always fighting n once when v were fighting he just snapped n then broke down saying it's all about you I have lost my child too does anyone thing about that did u try n console me? did I get time to morn?
All these q did make me think next morning I called my dr I knew I was depressed just didn't wanted to do anything got anti depressant BY NO MEANS I'M PROMOTING ANTI DEPRESSANT MED, BUT I BELIEVE IF U NEED IT U TAKE IT AFTER 2 YRS OF THAT VISIT I'M NOT ON MED ANYMORE
Sometimes u just need lil help
Once again I'm sorry for everything u r going thru pray it helps
now this is hard, did he want he divorce because of loosing your child at pregnancy?? or any other problems?
if it's about the lost of your son during pregnancy, talk to him and tell him everything and encourage him that you can still have another baby, i know its painful though, but why did you lose your baby by the way?? was there a careless act that you did? maybe it's the reason why your husband is mad at you, well anyway, if divorce will come, the only thing to heal it is time, TIME.. sorry for loosing your baby, and sorry for the bad news having your divorce.. May God be so Good and clear your husband's mind..
take care always!
hunny your just going to have to give it time. it is going to be hard to get over this relationship because of everything that you have been through with him. he sounds like from your other questions that he might be going through a depression as well so maybe one of these days he will come around. you probably want to get into some type of counseling to help you not only cope with the loss of your beautiful son but also the loss of your marriage. here is a hug from me. hang in there and just give it time. try to keep your self busy and email me whenever you need to vent.
It has also been a little over two months for me after our break up of 18 years. I started dating him when I was 13. Some days are better than others, but I have found the best way to get through is knowing that this feeling can't last forever if I don't let it. I have found that when I was the most upset I wrote in a journal and every now and then I look back at it to see how far I have come. I set up goals for myself each day, by accomplishing little things it makes me feel better. As far as missing him I still do, and this increases each time I see him, so if you can avoid contact this is the best thing for you.
First you must get over the loss of your son by grieving and expressing your emotions to a trusted friend or whomever.
You're husband is a jerk to leave you on your birthday after such a tragic life event. He must have have missed the part about sticking together through all hard times at his own wedding ceremony. He sounds like a selfish man less turd and you deserve better. If he left you this quick it would not have lasted forever anyways. I think you need time alone, go to church, hang out with friends and family. I know it takes time but this too shall pass. Obviously you have not found Mr. Right YET so after you take a break and get your mourning better Mr. Wonderful will come around when you least expect it.
First of all I am sorry for your loss.
Second of all, your situation does not sound like you need a divorce. You and your husband need a counselor. It sounds like you both just became so overwhelmed by your loss and didn't lean on each other. You may have become withdrawn, and by that he feels you don't love him, didn't need him. He is a man, your husband, they want to be the one you need, you run to.
If you still love him, you have to let the pain of your loss work though your heart, and go to your husband, and talk to him. Tell him the way you feel, everything, good and bad. What do you have to lose if the word Divorce is up for discussion.
I can tell you Divorce does not make the pain stop. I am newly divorced. I was in a marriage for 13 years. 9 of those I tried everything I could to save it. And it still hurts to know it failed.
Good luck to you..... my heart goes out to you.
if he won't go to therapy, go yourself, seek some Christian counseling. i feel so bad for u, it takes time to heal after the person u love hurts u and is no longer there for u. but there is a reason why things happen, and we don't always understand why.i did not cope well with my divorce, the only answer is to seek god, he's the only way when something bad like this happens. and don't blame yourself.
This worked for me:
Forbid yourself to dwell in the ';what ifs.';
It's easy to lay back and fantasize thinking what if I've done this or that... It solves nothing and only gets you more depressed. And it's a waste of time.
Cry all you want, you need to, but when it's time to think, make sure it's about the future, not the past.
It was really hard for me to follow this advice at first, but now -a year and a half later- it has become a pretty useful habit.
It is hard it will take you a long time I have been divorced for 10 years and it is still hard for me cause i still love my ex to
Find something to fill your time, like learning to play guitar,
suffering= pay more attention to God
and dont worry about him anymore
Seek comfort in the Lord.
normally I would say something very low class and vulgar....but for you ...no
I'm sorry for your loss.
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