For Muslim Women: How do you cope with divorce?

Assalamu Alaikum!





I just recently got married to a man whom I really love. We're from different cultures and it really creates disagreements at times. But then we still respect each others views and opinions.


The bigger problem is the family pressure. His relatives are from very traditional tribes in Pakistan and I'm from the Philippines. Basically, they don't like me and we got married without their knowledge. So if they find out, they will kill me and my husband. Now I'm 5 months pregnant though we tried to hide it from other people so that the news will not reach his family back in Pakistan but now, more people are getting to know the truth and I'm afraid if it blurts out. I'm thinking about getting a divorce so as to protect everyone involved especially my baby and my husband who are the most important to me.


I'm really hurting right now, I don't know how to start a life without him but I'm just trying to be strong because 1 life is depending on me.


I just need opinions and advice, because I don't have friends who will understand my situation.


Jazakallah Khair!For Muslim Women: How do you cope with divorce?
1st of all god be with you in all this


i am a Muslim man form Egypt


i really admire the way you introduced the problem and i think it is the key to solving it, you said and i quote your words ';i just recently got married to a man whom i really love'; and you added that respect and understanding between you as a couple is infinite.


what you should really know that his angry relatives can only affect you by stopping you two from getting married, but you are already married and the fruit of your love is on the way (your beautiful baby) so i would like you to be assured that the cure to all the problems that can be caused by your husband's relatives is PATIENCE. JUST BE PATIENT.


the worst thing to do is give up and get divorce, i think it is so negative and weak to do so instead of standing tall to his family.


GOD BE WITH YOU AND I WISH YOU ALL THE BEST, SINCERELY.For Muslim Women: How do you cope with divorce?
What rubbish, first of all u did wrong to marry without the permission of his family as he is a coward, and now for the sake of his family which is u and ur baby as well he should and must tell his family the truth in a polite manner.





Divorce will destroy lives specially of ur baby and also urs and ur husband.


I m a Pakistani as well.
If u r not leaving near his family(I presume u live in Philippines) u have nothing 2 worry. U r too far away from them. Just relax and be happy.


Try 2 learn more about Islam. Do u know that Philippines was originally a muslim country. Then the Spanish invaded it and started the crusades against the muslims(your forefathers). Those who did not convert 2 christianity were killed.


U don't worry about anything as they can't reach u.


Just pray 2 Allah and only Allah.
I hope the killing part is only a figure of speech.


Take this advice that I assure is a perfect one with great solutions:


Two Raka'at in the last third part of the evening, pray and beg for help from Allah.





You really can't imagine what and how many problems were solved in my life using this way.
dont get married!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!





reminds me of a friend i knew who married a guy from the khaleej he didn't tell his parents either and when they found out they threatned to take away his billion dollar inheritance, anyways they divorced because he couldn't live without his money.





sadly i think divorce is the best and the only option here.
Hi,


I am a Lawyer from Pakistan. You should not get divorce, this is very early. I hope everything will be okay with the time being. I hope your husband will handle everything. This situation is not new for him because he knows Pakistani Cultural he must has some plan to handle this situation.





Best Regards,


Ch. Ejaz Ashraf Lawyer ( Pakistan )


Email: worshipper1981@yahoo.com


Phone: +92 042 5314606


Cell: +92 0321 4581017
Have you discussed your feelings with your husband? Obviously he chose you for a reason. Talk to him, express your feelings to him, let him know your fears maybe he has a solution you havent thought of?
His family will kill you and your husband because of different beliefs? Wow, so narrow minded. This only boosts my view of a repressive belief that is called Islam. Wow.
tell me again how islam is the religion of peace , tolerance and non discrimination





is it any wonder why the west doesn't believe you?
I agree with Yaarob
I agree with Yaarob
Salam Alaikum





Just calm down! You being hormonal from the pregnancy. Don't do anything while in this state. Babies have ways of mending families. Divorce should be a very last resort. This baby needs two parents. You need the support of a husband and he needs his wife. InshaAllah everything will work out. Just be patient and trust Allah SWT to do the good things. Divorce is allowed but but highly looked down on. The bonds or love and marriage are higher than any culture.





3:21 And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves, that ye may dwell in tranquility with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are Signs for those who reflect.


May Allah give you mercy that will bind your family. Ameen
walaykum salam, %26lt;3





well congrats to the baby, may Allah swt make ur pregnancy an easy one :) amin %26lt;3





now to ur situation. sis, u want to get a divorce cos of his family? u have a baby on the way sister! and u want to divorce :( just cos of his scabby family? no sis, pls don't. Allah swt has blessed u with a baby and a loving husband whom u love dearly....and u wanna lose all that to a bunch of paki's..pssh...don't give in to them. Just keep having ur trust in Allah swt and praying to Him always.





I don't think this is fair on the baby or ur husband. Tell ur husband to be a man, and confront his family. subhanallah sis, i got tears in my eyes when i read ur question. Trust me, gettin a divorce, is NOT going to resolve this issue. say when u get a divorce with this man [AOUTHUBIALLAH] what happens to the child and urself! you may get depressed cos u still love him and the child is gonna suffer! so divorce is NOT an option sis...may Allah swt make ur days easy for u, amin :(





inshallah i think try to confront ur family...if they have an email, maybe try to email them if u can't afford to go pakistan and tell them





i wish u all the best sister


take care,


salam xoxo