Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Divorce...how do I cope?

It's been almost a year since I left my husband. There is no doubt from anyone, including myself, that I did the right thing by leaving him. I was never going to have anything with a drug addict. But why do I still miss him? I'm finally getting back into the whole dating thing. I'm seeing an old boyfriend, who I still care alot about. Yet, somehow I still feel like I'm cheating on my husband. Anyone got any insight?Divorce...how do I cope?
You did what you could for your ex, yet he still wouldn't pull himself out of the ditch. So now you are feeling a little guilty about giving up, about leaving him to deal with himself, and quitting on your marriage. Forget about it!





As much as we want to make someone love us, we can't. As much as we want someone to change and do the right thing, we can't make them. The only person who can change you is you, same goes for him. The only person who can change him is him. You gave him that opportunity, to change and keep you, but he chose his own selfish habits and ways. Do not wait around for him to come around. Bury him in your heart, let the pain heal, and move on. You deserve so much more.Divorce...how do I cope?
When you are involved with an addict you become accustomed to the drama and craziness of their lifestyle. It can be unsettling when things in your life become quiet and normal. You may miss the lifestyle or things about him, but you probably don't really miss 'him' because there is no 'him', just a drug induced fog of a man.





Don't confuse having compassion for your ex-husband with missing him. And don't sacrifice something wonderful you may have with the new guy for the drug addict ex. You've been through a lot and you are entitled to some happiness. xoxo
WHAT!!!!! Listen sister. You got the divorce for a reason. What do you mean you still feel like you are cheating on him. You Are Divorced! Move on you say you have an old fling now, so party like its 1999 Girl! Move on and make yourself happy! I bet you your ex is as happy as a clown with some other woman or two in his arms right now. Yes you are human you did love this ex but things did not and could not so get over it even though it is hard to do. But a better life without him awaits you that is why the divorce took place. Be happy love yourself and enjoy your life, sweetie.
Sounds like you're just lonely. The guy you're dating must not be doing much for you, because if he was, you wouldn't be missing your ex as much. Work on your self, exercise, go to church, read and do other self improvement things. Then, without putting to much effort, you'll find someone who will peak your interested and you'll be able to forget about your ex more easily. But, time is the best healer. It may take more time.
'cause you are a cheater! you promised to love him through sickness he got an addiction and you left him... you promised to love him til death do us part and you broke those promises... what kind of person are you! YEAH you are a cheater... you cheated marriage... WAIT that's not written down anywhere? Only on the religious part of it! Weird... isn't marriage a mess?!





How do you cope... stay single... learn a bit about yourself and what relationships are! Then move on.. don't jump from penis to penis to savor life... learn what you want before moving on!





later! n good luck
because by his being a drug addict, has made you co-dependent. you're in withdrawal. completely and totally natural.





get yourself some counseling this is for you. continue seeing your old boyfriend...it's an ego booster. and try to understand that it is what it is, and you cannot change the fact that you love you and want to make you happy.





keep your head up sweetie. you're almost through it!
The longer you were married to him the more you'll be attached to him. Sorry, I was married for 17 years when my hubby filed for divorce. Keep your mind busy, think of something or someone else.


And, before you know it, your thoughts of him will be gone for good! Wish you a happy ex-free future!!
It is the mentality of women. They cling. That is not necessarily a bad thing, it is simply part of your anatomy. You will probably always remember your first sexual experience. Guys usually don't remember it more than a week later.
Give yourself a break. Its only been a year. Depending on how long you were with your ex husband it may take a long while before you're completely past it.
Physically you have left him. Emotionally you are still holding on a bit. Give it some more time and these feelings will go away.
Yeah. Stop blaming yourself. It isn't your fault your ex was a drug abuser.
You still are in love with the man you want back.
if you want to have a fresh start you have to let the past go.
It is hard, I've been separated from my ex since April and it has been a really long road. I go through good days and bad days. Sometimes, I feel so lonely, and I double think what I did and wonder if it was for the best or not. Then I think to myself ';WHAT AM I THINKING?'; Whenever you think that you made a mistake, think of all the bad times, because if you are like me, there were plenty of bad times. I sometimes think ';Why is he so happy and I am sitting here miserable?';. Not true, you just don't know that they usually aren't as happy as we think. I talked to his girlfriend now, the one he cheated on me with and everything she tells me that she is going through is the exact same things I went through. He hasn't changed at all, just changed who he is treating like ****. While she was telling me all of this, my past kept flashing in my head. I was so grateful that I am not in that situation anymore. My house is so much calmer now. Sure, you are lonely, because you don't have anyone right now that really moves you, but that will change and your ex will be a far memory. I have learned that ';God never takes something from you to hurt you, he does this to make room for something better';. ';Let go and let God...';. Those two sayings have helped me so much. Just be patient, your time is coming, you never know when, but it will all work out...promise.

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